Yes, yes, we all do stupid things. What we don’t do is tell it to people in public. What most of us do instead is just pretend that it never happened. Hey, if no one knows about it, then it very well couldn’t have happened, right?
Well, what if there was someone who witnessed you do something stupid? Or, it could be that you saw someone say something astonishingly stupid that you still remember it. Thanks to the anonymity social media provide us, many don’t shy away from cheeky confessions.
Allow us to share some of the hilarious confessions we found on Twitter!
https://twitter.com/roxiqt/status/1290462008060588035?s=20
I said “‘A’ for effort,” to a coworker.
His response?
“It’s ‘E’ for effort. There’s no ‘A’ in effort.” *rolls his eyes*
— Mich (@MichDontheMic) August 18, 2018
A couple I know was flying to Hawaii from Ohio. She didn’t understand why it would take so long, because a flight to Florida is only a couple hours. She genuinely thought Hawaii was right below the US because in textbooks they put it in a box there… pic.twitter.com/gwNKycqHLd
— Tina Stoner ☮️ (@Tina_Stoner) August 18, 2018
I was entering customs at Gatwick Airport in London and I passed a tour group from Utah having a *heated* argument over whether or not they belonged in the 'foreign' line
— johndowgin.bsky.social aka John P. Dowgin (@johndowgin) August 18, 2018
Me: "how many slices in your large pizza?"
Guy: "12"
Me: "can you make it 10, not sure we can eat 12"— John Plunket (@JohnPlunket) August 18, 2018
https://twitter.com/therealrkl/status/1030625275527266304?s=20
https://twitter.com/adamfortner/status/1030842179428777984?s=20
I used to dye my hair blue. My freshman year of college, a girl came up to me and asked if it was natural.
— bayli (@bayliscott) August 18, 2018
https://twitter.com/dickfacecat/status/1030640851280646146?s=20
We were working on ideas for a marketing campaign and someone asked if we’d ever considered making something “just go viral”.
— robert manchild 🏳️⚧️ (@RobertManchild) August 18, 2018
A friend in high school thought the wind chill factor was the “windshield factor”. You know… how cold your windshield gets when you drive in the winter.
— The Drag State (@thedragstate) August 18, 2018
I was using my phone camera to check my hair and my CW asked where I got “that mirror app”
— bananafanafofisa (@lisaxy424) August 18, 2018
https://twitter.com/emilyhead_/status/1030712582913630208?s=20
This girl from high school once said “calm down max, titanic was just a movie!”
— Lamushka (@lemlust) August 18, 2018
For some reason I discussed male birthcontrol with a friend. He said he would never take a pill with hormones because it messes with the body. I asked him what he thinks the female pill does. He responded that the uterus closes so sperm cannot enter…
— Kathrin Loosli, Ph.D. (@KathrinLoosli) August 18, 2018
https://twitter.com/jenrieshka/status/1030790182902145024?s=20
Heard some American tourists at Stonehenge commenting that ‘they built it really close to the highway’.
— Megan Walmsley (@megswalms) August 18, 2018
In the US, at a theme park, woman asked where I came from…. said Belfast, Northern Ireland, Ireland, she responded with ‘wow, yet you can speak American so well ‘ 🤦♀️
— Elaine (@NotaBot1976) August 19, 2018
A fellow freshman in a college dining hall told me proudly he didn’t eat pork. I pointed out he was eating bacon. This is bacon, not pork, he said.
— Helen Kennedy (@HelenKennedy) August 20, 2018
On a TV programme in the 80s, they did a general knowledge quiz with a bunch of American teenagers.
They asked: What is Chernobyl?
One replied: Cher’s full name
— Jason in Berlin 😊 (@Jase3point0) August 22, 2018
A builder once told me that if an 80ft scaffold collapsed, he’d “ride it all the way down and just jump off at the last minute”.
— Neil McRobert (@NakMac) August 22, 2018
https://twitter.com/sdamackay/status/1033072862008160257?s=20
https://twitter.com/tealempire/status/1033084550430302208?s=20
https://twitter.com/CSUZooVet/status/1033203372709564417?s=20
https://twitter.com/erinlealight/status/1033351612918419456?s=20
Lady came into the fast food place I worked at DEMANDING I take the sugar out of her chocolate Oreo shake. She thought I could just somehow remove it. I just stared at her in disbelief
— Megan (@megeedoo22) August 25, 2018
Someone once asked me how deer know to cross at “DEER CROSSING” signs 🤔
— Marty Ritchey (@martymarty) August 18, 2018
https://twitter.com/_HiveOVillainy_/status/1030613461087051776?s=20
People Reveal Stupid Things On Social Media
While we live in this reality, many live in the reality of the idiot box. Yes, the television set has fooled many. One person on Twitter said that someone innocently wondered how Leonardo DiCaprio was still alive after the whole “Titanic thing.” I’m sure that person must have realized his/her mistake soon after. But, just to think that someone actually thought our precious Leo went through all that “Titanic thing” is hilarious. Thank God, he survived. Kate Winslet and all of us wouldn’t have survived without him.
Also Read: 18-YEAR-OLD REACTS TO SEEING HOW MUCH IS TAKEN OUT OF HIS FIRST PAYCHECK FOR TAXES
International travel is always a little intimidating, especially the customs line. Well, one person on twitter said he saw something funny as he entered a London airport. A tour group from Utah was caught up in an intense argument over whether they belonged in the ‘foreign’ line. Yes, thinking of oneself as ‘foreign’ for the first time is a strange experience.
Had an ex who was stupid? Well, pour your heart out on social media. One person confessed that his ex tried finding mayo in the fridge. She couldn’t. Why? Because the mayo was in the jar that said ‘mayonnaise.’
Is It Okay To Say “Be Pacific?”
Another person told us that someone she knew always said “be Pacific”, instead of “be specific!” Ah, language and people are a funny mix.
Well, it’s easy to rat someone out. The difficult thing is to expose some stupid things you might have done. We will have to give it up for the next one as she embraced her mistake.
While in an office meeting, she told her co-workers that everyone will get an A for their effort! Immediately, someone corrected her, while rolling their eyes, that effort starts with an E.
Also Read: NEIL DEGRASSE TYSON TRIED TO EXPLAIN GRAVITY WHILE BEING HIGH
Remember, when we used to be able to go to crowded restaurants and eavesdrop on people’s conversations? Crazy times they were.
One person remembers someone asking the waiter if their large pizza had 12 slices. When he said yes, the person asked him to make it 10 because they weren’t sure if they could eat 12 slices!
Who misses traveling? I certainly do. Well, I particularly miss the road signs that signaled that I had reached a place. But road signs can be confusing to some. Well, one person on Twitter confessed that her friend asked her how a deer knows that they need to cross at the ‘Deer Crossing’ sign.
Do you miss listening to stupid things people say? Just call your friends up. And see if you can bait them into saying something stupid.
Image Credit: Robin Littlefield