I don’t really like to box myself up or add a label to what it is that I am, but if I have too……. I am a total introvert and someone who really appreciates my time, space and solitude. With this in mind, I have recently discovered that introversion does not necessarily mean seclusion and disconnection.
Personally I like to think of introversion as more of an energetic thing. What I have got from other introverts and indeed experienced myself is that we are very sensitive to energy. So in the same way a bad environment sucks our energy, a good one can have the complete opposite effect and energise us.
I think a lot of introverts are round pegs, trying so desperately to to fit into square holes and this is why we maybe come across as socially awkward or anti sociable. The truth is we are not, a lot of us are just in the wrong surroundings to thrive.
One of the things you can do, not just as an introvert, but as anyone who feels like they are not connected with their surroundings is to change them. I recently got started with spoken word poetry and they have nights going on all week.
It is amazing, because there are so many different types of people involved- introverts, extroverts, great performers, shy people who struggle to share their gift and of course you get the odd crazy person who does something extremely weird.
For you this may not be the kind of thing that seems exciting, but for me it is and I think it is important that everyone finds things that makes them feel good, because if you are not doing what it is that is important to you, you are living with a mask on. You may be able to hold that mask up for a very long time, but in the end you get tired and the cracks start to appear.
In a culture that celebrates extroversion, it can at times be hard to accept your introverted nature, but once you accept this is who you are and you don’t need to change to fit in, as much as you need to find where you fit, you will be able to find more acceptance of this fact.
One of the things I have learnt from some of my more introverted friends is that they think they have little in common with people, I felt the same for a very long time and if you are feeling the same don’t worry- you are mistaken! There are so many people in the world, that even if you are a total weirdo (like me) you will be able to find a nice group of messed up weirdos to join you!
This comes with changing your surroundings- if you like mountain climbing, but hang out with tennis players, chances are you going to spend your life thinking that nobody climbs mountains. Once you change your surroundings and your outlook, you will find your tribe. But just remember you will never find “your type of people” looking in the wrong place!
I said earlier I think being introverted is a total energy thing- so don’t feel guilty about having alone time, telling people no and taking time out to rechange. Once you get in tune with your body, you will find it tells you when there is an issue or when you need to slow down. Listen to it, if you have to change plans, spend time alone or even hang out with one person who totally energises you, in place of doing something you know will drain you, do it!
Another thing I have found from personal experience and feedback from other introverts is we like silence, don’t get me wrong the deepest conversations I have usually happen with my fellow introverts, but there are times when we just need some hush.
Sometimes we need silence in our day to day lives, sometimes we need silence if we are out with a group, sometimes we go quiet when we are communicating back and forth with someone online or whatever area of your life it may be, introverts seem to need a little more silence!
In a society that celebrates noise this can be quite hard, but it is okay to have a little quiet, if you are out with people and you are just listening that is fine! If you are sitting with someone and there is silence for 5 minutes while you just sit with each other that is fine! In fact I may even argue that you can learn just as much sitting in the silence with people than you can asking questions. So when you find those you can sit in silence with, you know you have found your tribe!
This is just some of my experience as an introvert, I am not the only type of introvert there is and I am sure many will see things differently than I do. With that being said the biggest moments of change have come in my life when I have accepted myself over trying to change myself. We can’t change our essence, so we may as well just accept ourselves and find those who want to join us, this applies to everyone, not just introverts!
Much love, Luke
Luke Miller is the creator of Potential For Change and author of this article. He believes that spirituality is the foundation for good health and likes to blend psychology and spirituality to help you create more happiness in your life.Grab a copy of his free 33 Page Illustrated eBook- Psychology Meets Spirituality- Secrets To A Supercharged Life You Control Here
Are you on Aweditoria? Aweditoria is a new social media platform where people share small stories and ideas based on interests. Focusing on spirituality, personal development, health, activism and etc. No distractions, just pure knowledge, it is free to use and it only takes few seconds to join,click here.
THIS ARTICLE IS OFFERED UNDER CREATIVE COMMONS LICENSE. IT’S OKAY TO REPUBLISH IT ANYWHERE AS LONG AS ATTRIBUTION BIO IS INCLUDED AND ALL LINKS REMAIN INTACT.